Anger

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So its a no wonder my mother in law thinks I hate her.  I just found out today that there was sursprise birthday party for her last weekend.  And neither HER SON nor I were informed. It makes it hard to go to a party when you don’t know about it.

Also she had a new years party that WE WERE NOT invited to.  Its hard to go to parties and places and do things with a family that clearly has nothing to do with you.   Those are not isolated events either.  Just recent examples.

I just don’t understand why the cold shoulder, and I guess I never will.  They are always going to blame me for something.  this or that, and I give up.  I seriously am throwing in the towel.  I can do nothing right in their eyes.  So I’m done.

18 months young.

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Today my baby is 1 1/2 years old.  I seriously can’t believe it.  She’s walking like a pro, talking only when she feels like it.  She is quite the sassy little monster.  She is the most beautiful little girl, and I think she knows it.

18 months young

a semester off.

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So I know I just started back to school.  But I feel that I really need to take this next semester off and focus on myself.  Why you ask?  I am a people pleaser.  I like to please people.  I just can’t help it.  I rarely do things for myself, and this is why I have self spiraled into this weird spot I’m in.  Its not really a bad spot, just a weird one.

This next semester I plan on working on myself.  Finding the time to be myself, and do things for myself.  Not in a selfish way, but in a good way.  Like I plan on working on my health and fitness.  Find the time to do things and not be lazy.   I know how to be lazy, and I’m damn good at it.  I am going to become a vegetarian once again after christmas.  So not having to go to class right after work will help with me cooking meals, and not just eating the carb filled fast food.  I also plan on learning how to make jellies, jams, and to can veggies.  Its a tall order I know.  But I feel like if I don’t change something now, my life is going to get way more hectic.  Am I abandoning my studies?  Absolutely not.  But I feel like if I don’t get myself under control I won’t have a future anyway.   I am going to take this next semester and invoke the 10 minute rule I talked about in my last blog post.  I am going to take the time to cook good for you foods.  I am going to take the time to just play and be with my daughter.  I am tired of others raising her.  (and no I’m not downing her babysitters!  they are amazing!!)  I am going to take my time.  So I will hopefully blog my adventures more.  At least I plan to.  (I wonder how far that will go!)

So if you have stumbled across this wonderful place, because you too are wanting change.  Join me in taking time for yourself.  Learn something you want to learn.  Change what you don’t like about yourself.  I’m doing all of the above, and I am taking a time-out to do it.

First thing on the list.  Learn how to make “mason jar meals”, and take my lunch to work with me everyday.  And once I get really good, hopefully jon will want to take his to work too!  Who doesnt’ love a good looking mason jar?  I just made a Pinterest Board for it.  Gonna start crackalackin’!

invoking the 10 minute rule.

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So lately I haven’t felt human.  Not the, “I have no heart beating in my chest, so I must be a vampire or zombie” type of human.  I haven’t actually taken a few minutes for me.  And I am pretty sure it’s showing on my face.

So this has led to me, invoking the 10 minute a day rule.  I get at least 10 minutes, 5 in the am/ 5 in the pm, to myself.  So I remember to take my meds, wash my face, etc.  I am hoping I can get this to stick!

Wish me luck, give me some advice!

open letter

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This is an Open Letter to all those who never listened to their mother, father, aunt, uncle, step parent, foster parent, whoever raised you.

“If you do have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.  Weight every word, and think about its impact. You may have a significant impact on someone’s life someday.  Make it a positive one.”

Recently I have felt so many negative vibes from several different people, not all directed towards me.  So this isn’t really to one person, but many. Think before you say, type, or tell someone something.  You don’t know the situation that person is coming from.  Even if its your best friend, weight your words.  I feel so blessed that this was instilled into me at a young age.   It has saved me so much grief.  It’s also saved me from getting into a lot of trouble.  I have too many instances to count.

I guess the point of this blog is this, quit your word vomit.  From your mouth and your fingers.  It’s not productive, and it’s not cool or witty.  No one likes a smart a**.

blah blah blah

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As of Friday I will have interwebs in the home again.  I am pretty darn excited, and I’m more than positive jon is too.  Its kinda weird to not be “wired” at home.  We were at the old house, but this new house we havne’t been.  And we’ve been here almost a whole month now too.  It’ll all change friday.  (Do I like to talk in circles or what?)  Which will be a good thing!  I can update about the house with pictures!  I think I’m going in different directions than orginally planned.  Which is going to be awesome,  Pinterest.com is an amazing tool when planning!  I’ve got boards for just about everything.  Including what I want to get frances for Xmas! 

So this is kinda of a Blah blah blah type of post.  Going to end it…. HERE!

 

new things in old places.

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So the house we moved into is late 1800s, early 1900s.  It was definitely built before 1908, when Alton’s place where they kept records burnt down.  That much we know.  Its got lots of charm and it’s definitely a livable fixer upper.

Thankfully the previous owners didn’t have terrible taste!  Melissa and Nathan are actually friends of ours, we say their son Benton is going to marry our Frankie one day.  They are only 3 weeks apart in age.  (and totally adorable too!)  Thanks to them the house isn’t  tan, taupe and beige in every room!  I feel like those three colors haunt me.  In every house or apartment I’ve ever lived in, its been those colors. 

While I love the color in our bedroom, I think I am going to stick to the hue, but go slightly darker.  Make it more of a green instead of blue.  It’s a bluish-green turquoise-y type color.  REALLY pretty, but I’m not sure I’m going to be able to match it to paint a few spots on the wall that don’t have the color.  While I don’t plan on doing a huge decorating plan in there, I do plan on having a semi-theme.  I am getting these for the room to revolve around.  But also, I think I want to put these or these on a shelf in our room, or use them on my dresser as a “catch-all” type thing.  Now on to find a comforter that will look good.  I currently have one that would actually kind of match, but it has a bird theme on it.  So eventually it would annoy me.  So I think I want to find a chocolate-brown one. Maybe in down?  The hunt continues!

Maybe I should start a pintrest board for these.  Onto another room!